May, 2010

Getting to the point

Feeling: Excited

2010/05/27

Always wondering why a nice guy like you can't get a girl? Did you ever think it's because you're not actually that nice?

Since I eat out every day, I've noticed that some of my favorite servers will often "forget" to charge me for my drink. Because of this, I "accidentally" tip them more than normal.

Amazing stop-animation of NES videogames.

Catholics shouldn't get all the credit. Other branches of Christianity try to cover up their rapist preachers too.

Abraham enjoys child bondage in the Blasphemer's Bible.

I was at the bookstore last night and I saw an old man in his 60s in one of those big over-stuffed chairs reading a huge book of dirty jokes. Awesome!

100 things you didn't know about The Empire Strikes Back.

I cataloged a lot more of the memory in Super C in the NES Hacker Wiki.

The Japanese plan to have a moon base for robots ready to go by 2020. I think I speak for everyone when I say, "It's about time!"

I've got a nice busy weekend planned. Saturday will be spent at Cedar Point, Sunday at Mayfaire, and Monday I have off.


I wanna soak up the sun

Feeling: Sleepy

2010/05/27

Obama has declared a moratorium on oil drilling, and here's why.

Abraham lies to his son about murdering him in the Blasphemer's Bible.

For years, Warner Bros. has been suing people for pirating their media, but now it turns out that they may have been pirating anti-pirating software! I'm interested to see how this is going to pan out.

Here's an awesome graphic of the periodic table of the chemical elements converted into The Empire Strikes Back.

Peter Sprigg is a closet-homosexual. You can tell because he so adamantly opposes the upcoming repeal on "Don't Ask, Don't Tell". He believes that if we allow gays in the military, there will be tons of straight soldiers getting raped, so much in fact, that they will quit the service, and we will have an all-gay army. The marines will get fellated in their sleep, their superiors will be forced to protect the bro-raping homos. Sprigg's comments are actually really interesting because they're very similar to those heard by extreme feminists. Just replace replace all the straight men with women, and all the gay men with straight men, and it sounds like he's talking about women being victims of routine abuse.

A flash mob in Switzerland protests nuclear power and scares a lot of people!

If you're taking any herbal supplements, you may want to have a look at this.

This baby is in flavor country.

I cataloged a lot more of the memory in Super C in the NES Hacker Wiki.


That's just how I roll

Feeling: Sleepy

2010/05/26

Here are some interesting world records of the sexual variety.

Isaac nears his final destination in the Blasphemer's Bible.

A lot of Christians want to "teach the controversy" of evolution with Creationism in school. There isn't any controversy, but Christians use the idea as a tactic to get religion in public school. Well, The Onion amazes me again with their idea of teaching the controversy over global warming and the apocalypse!

Andrew Wakefield, the doctor responsible for the recent vaccination scare, has been stripped of his license to practice medicine in the UK due to the multitude of ethical violations regarding his study. Here are some of the major issues regarding the study:

  • Wakefield's study had only 12 subjects, and some of those children were hand-picked by a law firm who was trying to build a case against vaccine manufacturers.
  • The same law firm paid Wakefield 400,000 which Wakefield tried to kept secret.
  • A graduate student on Wakefield's research team accused him of not recording lab results that conflicted with the initial hypothesis.
  • Wakefield performed several painful and risky procedures on the children, without proper approval, including lumbar punctures and colon biopsies.
  • Wakefield did NOT find a causal link between autism and vaccines, he even says so himself in the study.
  • In his study's conclusion, Wakefield suggests that doctors stop using the three-shot vaccination, and instead use a single shot vaccination. And what serendipity, Wakefield had just patented a single shot vaccination!

More Super C work in the NES Hacker Wiki.


I'm pretty cool

Feeling: Happy

2010/05/25

Three men who were convicted of raping a poor teenage girl in China have been released from prison because an acupuncturist, after examining their ears, concluded that the three men were still virgins.

Happy Towel Day all my hitchhiking friends!

Abraham winds up in Middle-earth in the Blasphemer's Bible.

Cracked Online Magazine is always good for their lists. Here's the list of tiny creatures that can kill you real good and sitcoms that have soul-crushing endings.

I feel bad for anyone who would have Sarah Palin as a partner on a quiz show.

Two teachers in Florida dumped holy water on an atheist teacher. I guess they expected the atheist to explode in flames and return to hell from whence she came, but instead they've been suspended from their jobs.


I'm gonna be star, and people will crane necks to get a glimpse of me and see if I am having sex

Feeling: Cheery

2010/05/24

Every country is the best at something. Germany has the most solar panels, Mozambique has the most working women, and the USA has the most serial killers.

Even Abraham can't tell the difference between God and Satan in the Blasphemer's Bible.

Here's a fun Noah's Ark video to show your children.

More Super C code has been reverse-engineered in the NES Hacker Wiki.

Here's what some Christians believe would happen in atheists ruled the world. Get ready to facepalm.


I'm such a mystery as anyone can see, there isn't anybody else exactly quite like me

Feeling: Happy

2010/05/21

Craterface is a sad, but cool short cartoon.

It's hard to tell the difference between God and Satan in the Blasphemer's Bible.

If you're a Disney fan, then check out these graphs of 250 Disney Characters and 100 Pixar Characters.

There is a list of "9 Questions That Stump Every Pro-Vaccine Advocate and Their Claims" going around. The list was written up by a naturopathic doctor (i.e., not a doctor), and some people are really impressed with it. But not the people over at Science Based Medicine. They've issued a paper that disproves all of the claims, and it didn't even take them very much effort. It's amazing what real doctors can do!

I added the memory addresses for Paper Boy to the NES Hacker Wiki. Now you can get infinite papers, infinite lives, infinite time, etc.


I'm gonna be a rock star, and you will go to bed with me

Feeling: Excited

2010/05/20

Today is Everybody Draw Muhammed Day. It's gone quite well according to this video.

Muhammed even makes an appearance in the Blasphemer's Bible.

Yesterday, I accidentally overwrote my blog entry on the 18th with my 19th entry. Not wanting to lose my excellent rant on how retarded Texas is, I checked several search engines to see if any of them had cached my page on the 18th, but had yet to overwrite their cache with the 19th. None of them fit. However, I found something strange on Google. Their cached page was of the 19th, but their preview in the results list was from the 18th! The only problem is that the preview can't be viewed directly, so I was only able to get the first couple lines of the day. After playing with Google for awhile, I found that if I searched for different parts of the preview, Google would reveal different parts of its cache. This got me the first five sentences, but then Google wouldn't return anything beyond that. I found another search engine that had a cache from the 18th, and it gave me different results in their preview. I ended up copy and pasting the various fragments into the two search engines, and compiling the bulk of my 18th entry. I still came up short in some sections, but the more I recovered, the more I could remember, and after about an hour of racking my brain and digging though online backups, I was able to get everything back! So, now my entry on the 18th, once lost, is found! Damn, how I love technology!

Scientists claim to have successfully created a synthetic genome and injected it into bacteria, making the world's first artificial life!

One Saudi woman has enough, and beats the snot out of a virtue enforcer! Hilarious.

This light show is all kinds of awesomeness.

Here is a cartoon recap of the vaccination/autism scare created by the Wakefield study.

A anti-evolution bill in Missouri couldn't bolster up enough support, adding it to the ever-growing list of failing anti-evolution bills. Sorry folks, evolution is a fact, get used to it!


I'm gonna play some heavy metal wishin' you would die!

Feeling: Cheery

2010/05/19

Dear, BP. If an oil pipeline has been gushing thousands of gallons of oil into the ocean for several weeks, I think it's time to stop calling it a mere "spill". For a better description of the terms, read Matt Bors.

Golf ball sized hail is pretty awesome when it hits a pool.

Abraham gets the well in the Blasphemer's Bible.

Improv Everywhere reenacts Ghostbusters at the New York Public Library!

I just discovered an interesting typo. If you misspell "cocktail" as "cocktale" a liquor suddenly becomes a story about a penis.

80s movies bullies montage!

Want to keep up to date with your concerts? Check out sonicliving.com. Add all your favorite artists to your wishlist, and you'll be emailed whenever they play a concert in your area.


I don't have the patience to keep it on the up

Feeling: Okay

2010/05/18

Unless you live in Texas, you may not have heard about their textbook reform. Texas is odd in the fact that all of the state's schools are controlled by a single board of 15 elected members. These 15 people control aspects of the schools, including which textbooks will be bought for every public school in the entire state. The problem with this is that the people deciding what goes into the textbooks are not teachers or scientists, so they aren't qualified to make such important decisions. Furthermore, they're pushing a political agenda by trying to downplay important historical figures that they don't like, such as Thomas Jefferson and his freedom of religion contributions, so that they may increase the time devoted to their personal heroes, like anti-feminist Phyllis Schlafly. They also want to ditch scientific facts like evolution, and instead teach kids the importance of the NRA. Because every Texas school has to adopt these idiotic measures, it accounts for a large percentage of the sales of textbook publishers. However, this doesn't just affect Texas because textbook publishers may not be able to afford to make a special textbook for the ignorotti of Texas, so other states end up with the same Republican propaganda in their books too. Well, California is fighting back! They've introduced a bill that will prevent textbooks with obvious political agendas from being sold in their state. This will give textbook publishers fewer reasons to bother with the new Texas propaganda since California is the largest textbook buyer in the US.

Check out the videos over at Climate Denial Crock of the Week to see the various ways they make this happen.

Kitty makes strange tongue motions.

What is a good age for girls to start dancing like whore? Probably not this young!

Ever seen an octopus kill a shark? AWESOME!

Ishmael and Hagar are saved at the last minute in the Blasphemer's Bible.

Calling doctor Jones: The Europop band Aqua has regrouped and is planning to release an new album this year.


Doing things my own way, never giving up

Feeling: Happy

2010/05/17

Birds in slow motion are pretty awesome.

Nerdiest wedding cake ever!

John McCain has introduced a doozy of a bill into the Senate. It's called the Enemy Belligerent, Interrogation, Detention, and Prosecution Act of 2010. To paraphrase, the president may declare anyone, even a US citizen, a "terrorism suspect" without even giving a reason. Once deemed a "terrorist suspect" the person will be detained by the US military for as long as they want. The "terrorist" is automatically considered guilty and will never receive a trial. They won't be told why they're being imprisoned, they won't be given a phone call, they won't even get to speak to a lawyer. And, the entire time they're in custody, they can be violently interrogated. Land of the free indeed!

Abimelech and Abraham reach an agreement in the Blasphemer's Bible.


I'm a trouble maker, never been a faker

Feeling: Cheery

2010/05/14

Finally, a nice warm sunny Friday!

The politics of global warming is very similar to the politics of smoking. Large wealthy corporations and Conservative talking-heads are doing everything in their power to prevent people from learning the truth about it. They manipulate studies, hire unqualified "experts", and often just outright lie. Check out the videos over at Climate Denial Crock of the Week to see the various ways they make this happen.

Kitty make strange tongue motions.

What is a good age for girls to start dancing like whore? Probably not this young!

Ever seen an octopus kill a shark? AWESOME!

Ishmael and Hagar are saved at the last minute in the Blasphemer's Bible.

Calling doctor Jones: The Europop band Aqua has regrouped and is planning to start recording a new album this year.


Arachnophobialicious

Feeling: Sleepy

2010/05/13

I had an odd dream involving fireworks and barbers.

When I got out of the shower this morning, I grabbed my towel off the rack and dried my face. When I pulled the towel away, a huge spider ran across it. That's a good way to start the day; drying your face with a spider.

I've noticed that the old rhyme, "April showers bring May flowers," could more accurately be sung, "April showers bring much bigger May showers that persist for weeks."

Ishmael and Hagar may die in the Blasphemer's Bible.

News flash! People are gullible.

I just looked at my DAP, and I have over 14 -days- of music on it, and it's only half full. I love technology!


fix it fix it fix it fix it fix it fix it fix it fix it fix it fix it

Feeling: Aggravated

2010/05/12

I spent the first two hours at work this morning tracking down a bug that had already been fixed by my coworker! GAAAH! We need better source control.

I'm quite fond of mocking Fox News for it's inability to present unbiased journalism. But, am I being unfair? I don't think so. Just recently Fox News aired a segment where they attacked the message of Mr. Rogers. Their main beef was the fact that Mr. Rogers told children that they were special just they way they were, which they interpret as giving children an undeserved sense of entitlement. They cited a study that came out of Louisiana State University. I'm fine with them questioning Mr. Rogers. I mean, it's not like he was a child psychologist or anything. I always interpreted his message to be a positive one, reminding children that they shouldn't have to change who they are to be accepted, especially in a world that is going to constantly tell them they're not good enough. People are allowed to have dissenting opinions, but Fox fancies itself a news organization, and as a news organization, they shouldn't mix a curt fact with five minutes of conjecture. Yet, that is precisely what Fox News did. The story begins with the Fox crew calling Mr. Rogers an "evil man". In-between their insults and assumptions, they mention a study from LSU, which they often refer to as an "expert" source. When you search for the source, you'll find that the attack on Mr. Rogers was written by, no, not a child psychologist, but a professor of finance! Apparently, professor Don Chance's background in economics has made him an expert at parenting. He discovered that Mr. Rogers was corrupting our nation's youth after his American students often ask for a better grade while his Asian students just accepted their Cs. I'm not sure how he manages to find a causal link between his own racism and Mr. Rogers causing his students to seek a higher grade, but what can you do?

Ishmael and Hagar are kicked to the curb in the Blasphemer's Bible.


I got the power!

Feeling: Excited

2010/05/11

My replacement battery for my digital audio player arrived yesterday. I performed some minor surgery on my DAP, and gave it a test drive. My last battery had dwindled down to about 3 hours of use, but I left my new one on all night long and it only reports a quarter power drained. Finally! I will have music for long road trips again.

Last night, I also played my first game of Magic: TG online using Lackey CCG. Lackey is a program that lets you play practically every CCG online for free! It doesn't control the game the way that some programs do, but instead you have to manually take care of everything. It's a great way to practice decks you're working on.

Ishmael mocks little Isaac in the Blasphemer's Bible.

This site has a neat graphic effect where you rub off the picture to reveal new pictures.

What happens when the Japanese you splice videogames together? Odd results.

Which Christian is the biggest liar for Jesus? Here's a top 12 list.


You just stand there

Feeling: Okay

2010/05/10

Showed up late for work this morning when my brain confused 8:30 AM with 9:30 AM. I got the minutes right, that should count for something!

One of the unforeseen hazards of using stock photos for advertizing.

Want to bilk people out of money by preying on the ignorant? Learn these tips to become a psychic.

Sarah gives suck in the Blasphemer's Bible.

Be sure to read up on the important advances of fake science.

While at the bookstore yesterday I overheard the following, "Mom, some gay guy just hit on me." I turned around to see a feathery-blond-haired teen walking towards his Midwestern 50-year-old mother. "Well," she replied, "it's probably because you're so cute."


It's stormy out

Feeling: Happy

2010/05/07

If you like watching kids cry and scream after watching scary parts in movies, you'll love this list.

If you're Catholic, prepare to be embarrassed. Archbishop Monsignor Grings fears that human culture will soon openly accept pedophilia. Why? Because we are now openly accepting homosexuality. He believes that the only way we can prevent rampant child rape, is to snuff out the humans rights of homosexuals. Ignoring his abuse of the slippery slope fallacy, and that there is no evidence to backup his claim, the only large organization that protects pedophiles is, drum roll please... the Catholic Church!

Thankfully, Crayola has helped simplify Arizona's new immigration laws.

Despite all the recent hubbub about depictions of the Muslim prophet Muhammad, he has actually been displayed in art and parody fir hundreds of years. Here are some images of him down through the ages.

Isaac is circumcised in the Blasphemer's Bible.

A font from Team Fortress 2 has been added to the Game Font Database.


I'm too dumb to think for myself. Please, government, tell me who I should worship!

Feeling: Annoyed

2010/05/06

Today is the National Day of Reason, a secular holiday meant to combat the anti-Constitutional National Day of Prayer, a remnant of McCarthyism. The National Day of Prayer specifically states that Americans should gather together and pray to God. Such an edict violates the first amendment of the US Constitution by establishing preference towards a specific religion.

It only took a month and some change, but I finally got my Pittsburgh vacation pictures posted!

Until today, every web URL had to be written with Latin-based letters. This is because the USA created the World Wide Web, and dammit, we love our English. We're so cool that any URL without a country code is automatically considered an American URL. Well, today that changes. The first Arabic URLs have been created, and soon URLs for many other scripts will be allowed.

People getting hit in the face by water balloon condoms. In slow motion. In reverse!

Isaac is born in the Blasphemer's Bible.

RPG Heroes are jerks.

The Onion sure creates some hilarious mother-fucking articles.


Please caffeinate me

Feeling: Sleepy

2010/05/05

Yesterday, George Alan Rekers, the anti-gay activist who went on a week-long trip to Europe with a gay prostitute, said he didn't know that the 20-year he hired from a gay-prostitute website was a gay prostitute. After being grilled by reporters, Rekers said that he spent most of the trip trying to cure the prostitute of his gayness. Sure.

The makers of Starbursts finally took my advice and created a bag of just the red flavors.

God is a condom in the Blasphemer's Bible.


I'm not gay, but the male prostitute I hired is

Feeling: Sly

2010/05/04

In a hilarious case of "doth the Christian protest too much," George Alan Rekers, a prominent anti-gay activist, was found at an airport returning from a week-long European trip with a homosexual prostitute he hired from a website. Rekers didn't deny that he hired the gay prostitute, but he assured the Miami New Times that he only hired the prostitute to help him carry his bags, and he had no idea that he was gay. If you can even consider believing that bullshit, just take a look at the web site that Rekers hired the prostitute from: rentboy.com. That should clear up any doubt. Actually, I don't have any problem with Rekers hiring a gay prostitute for a sex-filled week in Europe, I only have a problem with the fact that he should have to feel ashamed for doing so. Even worse, that he promotes causes that make him feel ashamed.

Your doctor might not be as well educated as you would hope. A recent study shows that many of them still believe in these disproved traditional remedies and diagnoses.

To appease God, Abimelech gives Abraham a bunch of money and slaves in the Blasphemer's Bible.

A couple more fonts in the Game Font Database have been added.

Non-Stamp Collector has made a wonderful Bible Quiz Show.


So if you're lonely why'd you say you're not lonely?

Feeling: Cheery

2010/05/03

This is why it's important not to celebrate a victory too soon in sports.

Top 10 moments in SNL history where the cast couldn't stop laughing.

Gymnastics is way more exciting outside of the Olympics.

Abimelech confronts Abraham in the Blasphemer's Bible.

Here is a HUGE scale timeline of the Earth and a HUGE scale timeline of humans.

I added another font to the Game Font Database.

Sometimes advertisers come up with something entirely charming.