April, 2010

We got through April awfully fast

Feeling: Accomplished


Woman responds to being called "fat" by eating a chunk of the guy's ear.

Where's Waldo? As read by Werner Herzog.

What happens when a straight writer goes undercover to a Christian camp to turn gay men straight? The retreat itself is pretty outrageous. The attendees do all sorts of chanting, hugging, and role-playing, which I can't see how that could possibly make them straight. However, the ending is really quite sad. These men are being told they're not real men, and that they're evil, unless they can somehow change who they really are.

Abimelech finally wakes up in the Blasphemer's Bible.

Tim Minchin's song about the pope receives some animation. Not safe for work!

Gary Null, a man who has been panning a Gary Null's Ultimate Power Meal, almost died from using the product that bears his name. Now Gary Null is suing the makers of Gary Null's Ultimate Power Meal. Am I the only person that finds this hilariously ironic?

I picked up some new running shoes last night. They're quite cozy, and Autumn (the chick selling them) said they would help me correct my heel-striking pronating gait.

I added another font to the Game Font Database.

I'm a computer! Stop all the downloading!

Feeling: Nerdy


Super Mario Crossover is an amazing game! Remember all those times you wished you could play as a character from a different game? Well, now you can!

What if you're an artist who can't think of a subject to paint? Get on Chat Roulette.

Video bloggers should really come up with a more unique intro.

God threatens to murder Abimelech in the Blasphemer's Bible.

Scientists are blasting a small bit of hydrogen with a massive laser in an attempt to create a miniature fusion reaction! If they can stabilize it, we could kiss our energy problems good-bye!

Mathias learns about girls in this short Danish film.

Continuing to fix Nichole's computer tonight, and now working on my friend Heather's laptop. I should really start charging.

Make me a sandwich

Feeling: Nerdy


The Boy Scouts of America have created a badge for videogames. This almost makes up for the fact that they don't allow gays, atheists, or agnostics amongst their ranks while still receiving massive government kickbacks.

Remember Constance McMillen? She's the lesbian student who was banned from her prom for wanting to go with her girlfriend. Rather than allow her to dance, her school cancelled the entire prom. The school finally did allow her to attend the dance, except it was a decoy dance. Several conservative parents put together their own dance for their non-gay children, while Constance and a couple disabled kids were sent to the fake dance. Well, it just keeps getting better for her. The Westboro Baptist Church (famous for their "God Hates Fags" slogan) has decided to protest her graduation! On the same topic, a lesbian student attending the Wesson Attendance Center was actually excluded from the yearbook because she wore a tuxedo in her senior picture.

God violates Abimelech's free will in the Blasphemer's Bible.

Republican Tom Ganley is gunning for Democrat Betty Sutton's position in the House of Representatives. He obviously doesn't think much of her, or women in general, because he sent out a flier which read, "Let's take Betty Sutton out of the House and send her back to the kitchen." Wow, that's like the punch line of a redneck joke! Bill Heck, leader of the Medina County Republican Party, said that he saw the flier, "but I didn't think there was anything particularly wrong with it." Read the details.

Hanging out with my friend Nichole tonight. Gonna help her fix/destroy her old computer.

I don't want to be a substitute for the smoke you've been inhaling

Feeling: Adventurous


I've been bombarded with talk about smoking recently. The Michigan smoking ban goes into effect this weekend which will eliminate smoking from all public places including restaurants and bars. While I think that private organizations should be allowed to choose whether or not to accommodate smokers, I can't say that I'm very sad to see them go. A friend of mine also just took up smoking again after several months of abstaining, and my girlfriend smokes the occasional cigarette. I grew up with smokers my whole life. Every single person in my family, at some point, has been a smoker. Yet, I have lived to the age of 30 without ever taking a single drag. Until last night. In the spirit of not knocking it until I've tried it, I stole a cigarette from a pack my girlfriend forgot in my jacket, and smoked my first ever cigarette. Now, with personal experience, I can truly say that smoking is entirely revolting with no redeemable qualities what-so-ever. I didn't feel relaxed, I only felt a mild headache, and Flavor Country, apparently, tastes just like an ashtray. My mouth felt all clammy and I smelled awful, just like everyone else that smokes. So, my first, and last, cigarette was a huge success towards making sure I never take up the habit.

I love kid's toys that are amazingly perverse.

Abimelech has a dream about God wanting to murder him in the Blasphemer's Bible.

I've added a couple more hacked NES videos to my YouTube Channel. Yes, I'm just that cool.

Wonder why it doesn't keep you up at night night, like it does me

Feeling: Sad


Rachel's going away party took on quite a bit of rain, but it was still a wonderful event with tons of friends, many whom I rarely see anymore. I going to miss Rachel something fierce, but I'm happy that she's pursuing her life-long dream to be a carnie in the back-water state of Texas.

New Hubble photos to celebrate it's 20th anniversary.

Sony has just stopped production of floppy disks, making everyone ask, "Someone was still making floppy disks?"

People in infomercials are complete retards.

Abraham sells his wife to another rich king out in the Blasphemer's Bible.

When men get raped they just have to walk it off.

I uploaded some videogame videos to my YouTube channel to showcase some of the strange hacks I've made.

So make the bad horse gleeful, or he'll make you his mare

Feeling: Okay


Science fiction becomes science. A group of 30 doctors successfully performed a complete face transplant!

Trying to sell you kids on craigslist is apparently a crime! Personally, I think it's hilarious, and the guy who was charged with the crime claimed it was a joke. Although, when you see his mug, it makes you wonder if it really was!

Lot's inbred mutant children are born in the Blasphemer's Bible.

While I don't approve of everything that Obama does, I do have to admit, I like how he mocked Arizona. The state is trying to pass a bill that basically says, "if you have brown skin, cops can harass you."

I added some more notes for Contra in the NES Hacker Wiki.

Disney movies reworked to the audio of the movie Mean Girls.

I'll be at my friend Rachel's going away party all weekend. She's moving down to sunny overly-religious Texas. Best wishes to her!

Laundry day, see you there, under things tumbling

Feeling: Okay


Looking for a more creative way to hand out business cards?

New 100s are even more goofy looking than before.

There is an anti-abortion bill in Oklahoma that may pass which would allow doctors to withhold foetal defects from parents, thereby preventing them from making an educated decision on whether or not they want to have a child with severe birth defects. It would also require the woman to undergo unnecessary vaginal ultrasounds to try and persuade them from having an abortion. Finally, the bill would force the women to answer several personal questions about their sexual history which would be posted online for the whole world to see. This is typical of the Conservative mindset, they view pregnancy as a punishment for loose women.

Now, Lot has sex with his youngest daughter in the Blasphemer's Bible.

Some people just aren't gay enough to hang out with the gays. And speaking of gays, the president of Bolivia believes that eating genetically modified food (i.e., food) will turn you gay!

Who would ever think that you could get banned from Disney World for dressing too nice?

Eleven misspelled city names for you to mock.

It's a brand new day and the sun is high, all the birds are singing that you're gonna die!

Feeling: Okay


What's so special about your favorite number?

I unintentionally beat the game Demon's Crest last night. I say "unintentionally" because the game was surprisingly short and the end boss was easier than most of the other bosses in the game. I thought I was just watching a cut scene until "The End" appeared. After reading some of the FAQs about the game there are other things that I missed, so I'll try to do everything else I can with the game, but it's still a little disappointing. The game is beautiful looking and highly polished, but it can be beaten in just a few minutes.

Lot has sex with his oldest daughter in the Blasphemer's Bible.

It's curtains for you, Dr. Horrible. Lacy, gently wafting curtains.

Feeling: Blah


Check out these amazing photos of the Icelandic volcano.

Authors always make the most scathing critics of other authors.

Lot's daughters discuss raping their father in the Blasphemer's Bible.

Oh those silly Muslims. They claim that promiscuous women cause earthquakes. Certainly no Christian would ever be so out of touch with reality as to believe that God causes natural disasters to punish humans, right? Well... Brannon House believes that God is going to flood D.C. because we're giving health care to poor people. Oddly enough, his prediction didn't come true. I guess his radio to God must be getting sun spots.

Everyone's a hero in their own way, in their own not-that-heroic way

Feeling: Determined


There's a new Hiroshi Saga out! Though, it's painfully easy, it only took a few minutes to beat.

Daria is finally coming to DVD! You can pre order the entire series on Amazon.

The eruption of the volcano in Iceland had nothing to do with shifting tectonic plates or fault lines. No, according to Rush Limbaugh, God caused the volcano to erupt to punish America for giving affordable health care to the less fortunate! Apparently, if God doesn't like healthcare in the USA, he causes a volcano to erupt in Europe. Will we need to toss a virgin in to appease the island gods? How about a fat obnoxious drug-addict?

The University of California Hastings College of the Law in San Francisco has a simple policy; in order to get the benefits of being a sanctioned school group, you must allow any student who wishes to join. However, if a group chooses, they may be discriminatory in their members, but they will not receive the benefits of the school. Well, this policy of fairness just isn't good enough for the Christian Legal Society, a group that specifically bans homosexuals. But they don't call what they're doing "discrimination" they call if "freedom of association". Likewise, if a bunch of KKK members want to run black people out of Mississippi, they're not discriminating, they're exercising their freedom of association.

For a company that prided itself for driving a hammer through the face of Big Brother, Apple has come full circle to be the ultimate Big Brother company. They refuse to put applications on their platforms that involve political satire!

Lot hides out in a cave in the Blasphemer's Bible.

And when the gun goes off it sparks and you're ready for surgery

Feeling: Happy


Two steps in the right direction to report about today. First, US District Judge Barbara Crabb ruled that the National Day of Prayer is unconstitutional because it promotes religion, thereby violating the Establishment Clause of the first amendment. Second, Obama is working to give same-sex couples the same visiting rights in hospitals that different-sex couples share. Good work people!

However, there are some steps backwards too. Ireland is taking a page our of China's book, and looking to censor Internet access to its citizens.

Abraham gets a nice view of the carnage in the Blasphemer's Bible.

You can have your say in the most awesomest thing ever!

Quoting this bible is all about context.

A couple days ago a volcano in Iceland erupted spewing ash into the sky and grounding most of the flights over Northern Europe. While erupting volcanoes are pretty awesome, I'm particularly interested in the name of the volcano, which is Eyjafjallajökull!

Sometimes I wonder why they need me at all!

Feeling: Creative


Coping mechanisms for poor Internet grammar. Awesome!

Lot's wife is smitten in the Blasphemer's Bible.

Enjoy mocking the top ten lamest superheroes.

Want to have to pay for child therapy for several years? Why not hire an evil clown to stalk them?

Grade school teacher, Mark Tangarone, quits his teaching job because the imbeciles at Weston Intermediate School won't let him teach evolution. People from the school say that evolution "is a philosophically unsatisfactory explanation for the diversity of life," which is completely untrue. However, an another part of America, there is college professor who is equally brave, but not nearly as intelligent. Philip Haseley wants to create a class for studying UFOs.

I've added Player 2 notes for Life Force and Guerrilla War in the NES Hacker Wiki.

It's crazy warm today!

Bouncy bouncy fun fun fun!

Feeling: Happy


What happens when you put Peeps in the microwave?

Lot heads to Zoar in the Blasphemer's Bible.

I would like to jog with a baby kangaroo.

Black holes may contain entire universes, and our universe may be in a black hole of some other universe. Deep stuff!


Feeling: Happy


New study shows what everyone already knew. Frequent password changes don't help security.

Lot heads to Zoar in the Blasphemer's Bible.

I added some more hacking notes for Dragon Warrior.

Have you lost your right-click "New -> Tex Document" template for some reason? This web site will help you get it back.

Monty Python rocks.

Part of being 30 means rethinking your life. I've decided to stop flirting with 18-year-old girls and hanging out with punks at the arcade. Ha, yeah right, as if! Maybe when I'm 40!

What's the buzz?

Feeling: Happy


I'm 30 now. When did that happen?

Connecticut Catholics are up in arms over a bill that will remove the statute of limitations over sexual abuse crimes. Gee, I wonder why?

There was a halo around the sun today.

This game is pretty cool.

Want to see the demolition of an entire stadium?

The angels kick Lot out of Sodom in the Blasphemer's Bible.

What's more likely, that your eternal soul, bestowed upon you by an omnipotent creator, is heading towards the light of a magical land of paradise, or that you just have too much carbon dioxide in your blood?

Everything is wonderful now

Feeling: Elated


The Eve 6 concert was phenomenal! Full story here.

Everyone knows that Apple is an evil corrupt corporation, so the following story won't come as a big surprise. Flash is extremely popular on the Internet, and nearly all of the videos and games you see online are done in Flash, and yet both the iPhone and the iPad do not support Adobe Flash. Apple gives plenty of reasons as to why they won't run Flash, but the only valid reason is that they don't like the Flash format. Thus, a good portion of the Internet is not available to users of Apple products. Recently, Adobe, decided that they would create a special program to compile Flash onto the native code that Apple uses for the iPhone and iPad in order to bridge the gap, and allow the Apple's mobile products to support Flash. When Apple heard about this, they added a special disclaimer into their Terms of Service Agreement preventing Adobe from doing that! Flash would work just fine on Apple products, but Apple just won't allow their customers to use it. Apple is a control-freak. Apple is Big Brother. This is also rather unusual because the only software advances that Apple ever had is its media suite, written by Adobe.

Lot's sons-in-law are not impressed by angels in the Blasphemer's Bible.

I downloaded my entire web site and then scanned it with AVG, Malwarebytes, and Spybot. All of them turned up negative, so my I believe I'm fully clean this time.

The purpose of a crisis pregnancy center is to talk to women about pregnancy and birth control and offer services of affordable birth control and referrals to abortion when necessary. However, there are a number of "crisis pregnancy centers" that are funded by Christian groups. These centers don't provide referrals to abortion clinics and often don't even provide birth control. Their only purpose is to try and guilt expecting mothers into having an unwanted pregnancy and to spread disinformation about birth control while preaching abstinence. However, the city of Austin, Texas recently passed an ordinance that would force pregnancy centers to display what services they provide at their entrances to ensure that women aren't tricked by these imposters. Well done!

If advertisers had to be honest, their ads would look more like this.

It's good to be bad if it's better than bored

Feeling: Excited


I'm not sure which is worse, going into a public restroom filled with the stench of feces, or going into a public restroom with the stench of cheap cologne. Seriously, how much cologne must you be wearing to overpower the stench of poo?

The smallest force ever detected has just been measured and it weighs in at 174 yoctonewtons. That's 0.000000000000000000000174 newtons of force, and to put things in perspective, 1 newton is equivalent to the amount of force an apple has on whatever it's sitting on (i.e., not very much). If the scientists build even more sensitive equipment, the Standards Institute will have to come up with another set of prefixes!

Mega Man photo mosaics are win!

Lot is informed to gather up his family and leave Sodom in the Blasphemer's Bible.

This short video called Pixels is awseometasticle!

Remember that story of the lesbian girl who wanted to go to prom with her girlfriend, only to have her Mississippi public school prevent her from attending? Well, it turns out that she did go to prom after all, only it was a segregated prom. It appears that the school created a tiny prom (seven people all together) for her while her classmates attended a different prom elsewhere, funded by parents.

My domain was taken down for about an hour today due to some legacy spyware. I'm not even sure how it registered, the only infected files were a pair of html files that didn't even have any links to them anymore. Anyway, the files were removed, my sites are back up, and I've been running scans to make sure nothing else is still infected. I'm about 90% through, and everything is clean.

Eve 6 concert tonight! Suck it nerds!

I can has break?

Feeling: Accomplished


What would happen if Dr. Horrible's Sing-a-long Blog were an 8-bit videogame?

The high score in the game Asteroids, that has stood for 27 years, has just been broken. It took John McAllister three days of solid playing to rack up enough points.

The angels go on a blinding rampage in the Blasphemer's Bible.

How do a bunch of Canadians peeing in public make you want to stop idling your car?

Why can't I write off all the money I spent on taxes on my taxes?

I don't think I'll get an iTampon.

Feeling: Happy


Graphic artists will appreciate this font tutorial.

Will the iPad blend? It sure will! And speaking of the crappy iPad, how secure is it? Well, it took a hacker a single day to get root access.

The Irish don't take their blasphemy laws very seriously.

Think you know your videogames? Try out this quiz. I was able to get 44 of them!

Catholics do it in the rectory!

Lot is a terrible father in the Blasphemer's Bible.

Here are a couple of pictures of my friend Wallee and me going to RHPS. 1 2 3

I should really start my taxes.

Hey you guys!

Feeling: Content


Pittsburgh was amazing, and I'll have the whole recap with pictures up before too long.

Sure hundreds of priests have been raping children for decades, but, according to a Catholic spokesperson Bill Donahue, most of the children were 12 or 13, so it wasn't so much pedophilia as homosexual rape, and as we all know, homosexuals are evil. The Pope's priest, Raniero Cantalamessa, has said that the public outcry against the Catholic church raping boys is similar to the persecution of the Jews by the Nazis. The Nazis movement used warfare tactics to take over the world and executed millions of people because of their heritage. The Vatican is has been working diligently to keep child-raping priests out of jail; I don't quite see the similarities. Need I also bring up that the Catholic church did nothing to denounce the Nazi movement or Adolf Hitler (a Roman Catholic) during WWII? Of course, one of the Vatican's exorcist (yes, they still condone exorcism) believes that the negative publicity regarding the Pope has nothing to do with the fact that child molesters were operating under his nose, but that Satan himself is writing the articles.

Chocolate Easter Bunnies being melted. This reminds me so much of my childhood!

The men of Sodom get a little frisky in the Blasphemer's Bible.

I've beaten the NES games Ice Hockey and The Goonies.