Genesis 2:25 also mentions that Adam and Eve are man and wife. When did that happen? Did they have a ceremony and not invite us? Did Eve have a bunch of woodland creatures as bridesmaids? Did Adam have an armadillo for a best man? Did a hamster preside as the priest? Did they use a stick for a wedding band? What happened to that bible story? I mean, it's not like it has any credibility to lose, and it's certainly more interesting than hearing about the origin of dirt.



Jennifer writes:


I imagine that if GOD says you are married, you are married. Period. No ceremony needed. That's the reason you have to get married in the correct church or you aren't married in the eyes of God...(Correct being defined as the same church the person telling you this, naturally)

Lotm writes:


Jennifer: To quote the comic, "Oh snap!"


kris writes:


i'm all with jennifer on this one: if god made eve so that adam could have a wife (and she'd have to be his wife for him to cleave unto her, surely?), surely they were married more or less from the start? (god: "oh eve, hi, great you're awake. meet adam, your husband that i made you for.")

TheAlmightyGuru writes:


Jennifer: "I imagine that if GOD says you are married, you are married..." But that's exactly my point; God never said they were married. At least not in the bible. Adam just, all of the sudden, starts referring to Eve as his wife.

Of course, once again, we have an ambiguous translation. The Biblical Hebrew word used is "'ishshah". However, "'ishshah" is translated in various ways throughout the bible. Sometimes it translates to "wife", other times it translates to "woman", and sometimes just to "female". There's no way to know for sure how "'ishshah" should be translated in the context of Genesis.

Also, assuming they are married, they had no say in the marriage whatsoever! It's as if God fancied himself the perfect matchmaker, never taking into account their opinion of each other.

Ray writes:


Personally, I'm just wondering about Eve's dialogue: "I'd be ashamed if that were me.". Is she referring to the fact that Adam has a penis, which she does not want to have one of? Or is it that Eve is not naked. But if that's the case, then who other the Adam is naked? Qazar? The Narrator/God? I'm sorry to say, but I'm a bit confused by this one. There are apparently 2 naked people, but I can only identify 1 as being naked. Anyone care to help me figure this out?

God writes:


Ray, I think Eve's referring to the size of Adams penis...

TheAlmightyGuru writes:


Good call God. You are omniscient after all!

hmmm.. writes:



HeebAnon writes:


The original definition of marriage (to Jews) was that of intercourse - if a man has sex with a woman, she's his wife. If a married woman has sex with a man... bad news. =(

Part of this may have to do with the fact that it's pretty easy to record who mom is... but telling who dad is at birth is a lot more difficult, especially if mom's had sex with more than one man in the last 3/4 of a year (or so).

Katy writes:


@HeebAnon - that's why so many ancient cultures were matrilineal, if not matriarchal, in nature. Property passed through the woman because they could - as you noted - be certain of who the mother was, whereas exactly how that "seed" got planted was at first mysterious (ancient Celtic myths often speak of women swallowing a grain of wheat or something that transmutes into a baby in her womb, etc.); and then later when women were still free to be with whomever they pleased (virgin originally meant only that a woman was not tied down to a specific man - free, in other words) - but at least knew how babies were made - it was still difficult to name the father if she'd been with multiple partners during the critical time period.


Oh the irony!